Some girl is sleeping in my bed…

Life is interesting… Or maybe I should say people are interesting. Matter of fact I’m interesting (not to toot my own horn or anything). I have dreamed of living in New York City longer than I can remember. I’ve always been infatuated with the lights, glamour, hustle, people, food, and art. Another dream of mine was to become a clothing Buyer. I’ve always wanted to be the person that chose the fabulous blouse and great jeans that made someone’s day. Whelp a few months ago, after years of studying the business, struggling, failing, then finally succeeding, my dreams came true. I got promoted to Buyer and moved to New York City into a fabulous (yet small) studio apartment on the Upper East Side. Everyday, I now get to select, edit, and buy the fabulous blouse and jeans that I’ve always wanted to.

Life is great and I could not ask for anything more. To get to see a dream of mine come to fruition at the tender age of 24, is amazing and powerful at the same time. I am so proud of myself and everything that I’ve accomplished. But.. and there is always a but… in transitioning into my self defined greatness I’ve also realized that I’ve left a lot behind me; my home in Boston, friends, and boyfriend. My old roommate has found a new roommate, my boyfriend still frequents our old hangout spots without me, and my friends are still up to their antics without me present. My intentions when writing this were to express how sad I was about everything not stopping because I was no longer present, which I know sounds wildly self-centered of me, but this is my blog and I can speak my truth (so ha!).

After further thought I now realize that my decision to move was a critical and necessary one for ME. I chose to make the decision to move to NYC and live alone to challenge myself and live out my dreams. To think that everything would stop or slow down purely because I was no longer there was ridiculous. Life goes on. It doesn’t slow down for anything or anyone. For the past three months, I have felt like I’ve been missing out on everything in Boston, when in actuality I’ve been missing out on things in New York. I now realize that sometimes you have to let go of something good to get something great (career wise, not my friends/ boyfriend.. I love them).

To sit and wish I was somewhere else is to waste where I am now. I need to sit back and enjoy the fruits of my labor. I got here…. now to figure out what to do with it all.

I’d like to Thank the Academy

pinkroses & redwine has been nominated for the Liebster Award! Thank you David, author of the 20somethings in 2013 blog, for the nomination!  Back in February, I wrote a profile for the 20somethings in 2013 blog about my career aspirations and goals you can see my profile on his site, check it out!

To accept the nomination, I need to answer 11 questions that David posed of his nominees, nominate 11 other blogs, and ask them to answer 11 questions. Below are my answers and my nominations:

1. What qualities matter most to you in a job?

Passion for the work, a team dynamic, autonomy in my position, and having something new to do everyday.

2. What is your dream job?

If I could do it all over again, I would go to culinary school to become a pastry chef and own my own coffee house/bakery. The coffee/bakery shop would be modeled to look like a French patisserie and have local bands to entertain guests. I would use local farms and everything would be organic (NO High Fructose Corn Syrup ).

3. Who are your role models?

To know me, is to know that I love people who have a story. My role models are people who have overcome adversity or to quote Oprah, had an “aha” moment. They are: My Mother, Arianna Huffington, Bethanny Frankel, Oprah, Iyanla Vanzant, Jamie Fox, and a few executives at my office ( NM, MB, JS, SA).

4. What inspires you?

People who are passionate about life, helping others, a beautifully decorated space, stories of people overcoming obstacles, the perfect summer day.

5. What is your favorite quote?

I have many, so I’m bending the rules and putting down three of them.

“I did then what I knew how to do, but when I knew better, I did better” – Maya Angelou

“Enlightenment is the unlearning of a system based on fear” – Marianne Williamson

“The real you is more interesting than the fake somebody else” – Lauryn Hill

6. If you could travel ten years back in time, what advice would you give yourself?

Being that I would be 14 years old… I’d sa,  don’t try to “fit it” it’s not worth your time. Don’t stress out about relationships, you’ll find “the one”, don’t stress too much about time management, it will be a work in progress throughout your life.

7. What special or unusual skills do you have?

I have a photographic memory (one of my many superpowers 🙂 ).

8. What is your greatest achievement?

It may seem lame, but starting this blog was a huge part of me growing into the woman I am today. pinkroses & redwine gave me the outlet to express my passions outside of my career.

9. What is the most unexpected fact you’ve learned from your job search?

You’re major doesn’t matter as much as I thought.

10. What are your best qualities?

I’m extremely outgoing, extremely organized and like to plan out things in advance, my ability to ask for HELP when I need it!

11. Who would you want to play you in a movie about your life?

Kerry Washington (DUH!)

Here are my Nominations:

Nominations:

1. Reflections of a Single Girl
2.  Renaissance Stan
3. Cheeky Social Media
4. 20- Something Angst
5. 20’s Inc.
6. THE ZEN PROJECT
7. What’s the Tea
8. Life At Twenty Something
9. Get Fit or Die Trying
10. Exhilarated Living
11.  The Virtual Virtuoso

Here are my questions:

1. Why did you start your blog?

2. What has been your biggest life lesson thus far?

3. Red or White? (WINE of course)

4. What is your favorite quote?

5. Where is your dream vacation spot?

6. What has been your biggest lesson in love?

7. Name three things you could not live without.

8. What has been your proudest moment thus far?

9. What is the #1 thing on your bucket list?

10. What is the “fun fact” you usually use during ice breakers?

11. If you could have your ideal life in 5 years what would it look like?

You Can Only Control the Controllables

I am a control freak, this I know.  If there is anything I know about myself, it’s that if it can be planned, put into an Excel spreadsheet, checked off, or crossed out, I am all over it. For those of you who are the “fly-by-the-seat-of-your-pants” kind of people, I either sound like an alien from another planet or your best friend. My ability to juggle tons of details is perfect for my line of work, but murderous in all other aspects of my life, like the weather, my love life, friendships, and the general day- to-day functions of being a human being.

This past Sunday, I watched an episode of Super Soul Sunday on OWN featuring DeVonn Franklin a film executive, pastor, author, motivational speaker, and husband to Meaghan Good. Throughout the episode he used an analogy that related life to a movie project. He spoke in a spiritual sense about God being the director and us being there to co-create our lives. He went on to talk about conflict being the key to building character and growing on-screen and off.  Like any good movie, the ability of actors to accept conflict and push themselves to further to new heights, is the key to developing the storyline (and makes for great ratings!).

He went on to say that we needed to know what the vision of our lives was, and gain clarity about our purpose. Without doing so, we would be unclear of our next steps and goals.

Whether you are a religious, spiritual, or an atheist, the message can still be received.  What I got out of it, was that we can not control everything in our lives, so the less we stress about everything being “perfect” the more we can concentrate on development and growth. The more we persevere through hardships, struggles, and against eating that delicious chocolate fudge brownie, the more we grow as people (I am trying to give up sweet treats!).

Being a twenty-something is hard purely for the fact that I have no idea who I am yet. I have no idea what it really feels like to hit rock bottom, nor do I want to. I have no idea how far I will go or how long it will take me to get there.  But I will say that it feels damn great to know that I can’t fuck this up because I cannot control everything else around me. All I can control is myself, and in some way that’s empowering. I have to have faith in myself that I can create my vision, my inspiration, and my development, the rest is up to the universe.

Here’s a link to a clip from the episode: Super Soul Sunday- DeVon Franklin

Jamba Juice Ain’t Got Nothing on Me

This morning I woke up at 6:00 a.m. And if you knew me, you’d know that is UNHEARD of for this woman. I am not to be disturbed until after my first sip of coffee. But this morning was different; this morning, I had planned to start the morning healthy and take the first steps toward a different lifestyle. After spending more than half my Sunday looking up workouts, vitamin supplements, probiotics, healthy food choices, and recipes for the perfect smoothie; I set out on my journey to the grocery store. With my bags a lot heavier and wallet A LOT lighter, I returned armed and ready for the healthy life I’ve been talking about since the beginning of the year and in my previous post You’re Only as Strong as your Weakest Link.

Being the planner that I am, I planned out my meals for the week, and breakfast I decided would be special.  Breakfast, was going to be a Citrus Berry Smoothie, which I was so exited to try out. So excited, that I woke up at the crack of dawn and dragged the boyfriend into the kitchen to witness my amazing “future wife making smoothie skills”.  As I  got out all the necessary ingredients, I talked up how good this smoothie was going to be, how great we were both going to feel, and how a healthy life was the best life. But as I reached for the blender, my weak non iron pumping arms gave out and for what felt like 30 minutes everything was in slow motion. As I watched the blender slowly crash to the floor and shatter into a million little pieces, I felt my citrus smoothie dreams crash along with it. Talk about starting your morning right.

Attempt #2 tomorrow:  I bought a new blender and I even did a few push-ups for good measure.

Food for Thought: Morning Digest

My roommate and one of my best friends definitely falls under the category of “insatiable article reader”, she goes hours without even noticing anyone is in the room (which totally sucks when you want to have a conversation with someone other than yourself).  However, one of the perks of having a friend who is obsessed with reading articles, it that they tend to share. This morning I woke up to an e-mail titled “Food for Thought”, knowing that it was from my beloved article reader, I braced myself for a long one. But to my surprise, it was short, sweet, and thought invoking; my favorite kind!  Here it is:

“An old Cherokee chief took his grandchildren into the forest and sat them down and said to them, “A fight is going on inside me. This is a terrible fight and it is a fight between two wolves. One wolf is the wolf of fear, anger, arrogance, and greed. The other wolf is the wolf of courage, kindness, humility, and love.” The children were very quiet and listening to their grandfather with both their ears as he then said to them, “This same fight between the two wolves that is going on inside of me is also going on inside of you, and inside of every person. They thought about it for a minute, and then one child asked the chief, “Grandfather, which wolf will win the fight?”

He said quietly, “The one you feed.”

 – Old Cherokee legend, quoted in Someday You’ll Thank Me for This!

It made me realize that I am in control of how I choose to start my day. I make the conscious choice to feed each wolf that lives in me. Hope this finds all of you well this morning!

My roommate also has a blog, Check hers out: EverythingTaylored

Click here for the origins of the story.

You’re Only as Strong as your Weakest Link

Thus far in my life there has never been a time when I thought I couldn’t do something. Don’t get me wrong, there have been times when I have doubted my abilities and the outcome, but never have I ever thought that I could not do something. I have my Mom to thank for the encouragement and good rearing, which was heavily based on the efficacy principle (more to come of that!).

This philosophy has worked in every aspect of my life EXCEPT when it came to being healthy and working out. I seemed to have a hard time getting on the treadmill and putting down the cosmos, late night snacks, and ice cream. Don’t get me wrong, it’s not like I’m 300 pounds or anything, but I do want to be healthy and live a long life. More importantly, I would like to put on a bathing suit and not want to go on a cottage cheese and water diet 1 week before my vacation (I do not recommend at all, totally not safe and not all that effective).

So in an effort to stay healthy and look semi-decent in a bathing suit come summer time, I’ve decided to be smart about this whole thing and come up with a plan. Life is short blah blah blah, I know– but I think I can be healthy and drink wine (red wine of course) at the same time.

So far, here’s the plan:

1. Learn how to eat healthy – Go see a nutritionist and read health magazine and blogs.
2. Sign up for Myfitnesspal.com to track my progress. This website allows you to track both food and exercise.
3. Use Pintrest as a motivating tool Pintrest board- Working on my Fitness Board
   
4. Try to go Vegetarian in the month of March.
5. Stick to it!

Any other things to consider??

I Love You, But it’s Killing Me

So I have come to the realization that I am the type of person that allows everyone’s shit to become my shit. Don’t get me wrong, I mean it in the most loving tone and I do it out of love. I genuinely want to help the people in my life with their shit.  Though I do not think I actually know the difference between helping them and jumping in and fixing it for them. It’s not like I go out trying to fix everyone’s problems, fight crime when I get home from work, and be a hero.  I certainly do not think I am superwoman (though the thought of being able to fly is quite enticing), It honestly just happens that way. All of this has led me to believe that I have an issue.

The issue evolves from the pure fact that my attempts at being supportive usually end with their problems somehow becoming my problems. I end up being more upset, more stressed, and more exhausted than they are. I literally take over completely and DRIVE MYSELF CRAZY!

Truth is, I don’t think I know how to be the compassionate friend. Meaning, support them through issues in life, as in listen and just be supportive. Instead, I go bat shit crazy, jump in, and join the suffering and commiseration. I am the friend who thinks it’s my duty to see them through the end and make sure they feel better so that, NO– I can feel better. I overstep boundaries, I follow-up constantly on progress, all because I genuinely feel bad if it doesn’t go the way, NO–I expected.

In an effort to not go mad<– me wishing I had a British accent, I have decided to learn what it really means to be compassionate and be a supportive friend. I vow to find the balance between telling your boyfriend off for you, and giving you that awkward “I’m Sorrrry” look accompanied with the “Sucks to be You” uncomfortable hug.

Moment of Truth #3

Put the petal to the metal and the ink on the paper

• Make things happen by writing your vision and thoughts down.
• Make a vision board or a book of possibilities
• Ask for what you want. The most important part in life/business is making the ask.
• Don’t be afraid of getting what you want when it arrives.