No Pink Roses, but we got Red Wine

Everybody wants to feel loved. A simple yet hefty statement. Though, this statement lends itself to allow people to go great lengths to feel loved and fall in love. But how far is too far? And more importantly how much are we willing to give up to get it? Is there an equation for love, some hidden set of rules for who and when we get our shot?

I mean don’t get me wrong, I love falling in love, and the feeling of a great date. I’m not going to sit here and bullshit you into thinking I’m one of those fuck men I don’t need “d*ck kind of women. Because truth is everyone needs it. Yes gay men out there I mean you too, and you too Miss I parade around judging all those tramps fornicating all over the place. Meanwhile, you’re the girl keeping Pornhub.com in business I AM TALKING TO YOU!

Well back to the point, sorry I get a little testy when it comes to the judgmental ones.

We go through great lengths to be in relationships. Here are a few of my gems:

You wait by your phone checking to make sure you have service, volume is on high, or you sit and wait for that tiny red dot to start blinking, or the message window to pop up, on the off chance you went deaf and blind, at the exact same time that all the cell phone towers around you all of a sudden suffered some mechanical failure that oh so tragically prevented you from receiving that fabulous if not meaningful response to your ” hey last night was fun, want to do something this week?” text.
Then when your response comes 3 hours later in the form of ” umm yea, sure hit me up.” You somehow are giddy with joy and can’t believe he wants to see you again! You begin to dance around the living room like you’ve just won the $5,000,000 Publisher’s Clearing House Sweepstakes.

You “casually” start stopping by the bar by his house when his favorite football team is playing to “grab a beer with your friends” on the off chance he might be there.

Dates become late night McDonalds runs on your side of town just on the off chance that he runs into Dave, you know his “annoying friend who he’s been trying to avoid”, and its just easier to drive the 15 miles to your McDonalds.

Please don’t take this as me passing judgment, I’ve been there been there done it a thousand times too many. But, just a thought, we all agree we are willing to go some large distances to prove to ourselves that we can deal with all of his “quirks” because this could go “somewhere”. He maybe flaking, rude, judgmental, distant, fucking other people, taking 4 hours to answer text messages, but somewhere deep down he really cares and wants to make this work. ERRGGGGHHH????

The place you have arrived to is called Settletown population 1,000,000. This is the place where you settle for a hamburger when you deserve the Filet Mignon. Grape juice instead of that fabulous glass of Cabernet Sauvignon, Fro-yo instead of Ice Cream, Regular instead of Premium, or a vibrator instead of the real deal! I am in no way trying to be rude and negative but really doe? Get it together!
Sometimes in a relationships, and I do mean a relationship, in which two people are equally physically and emotionally invested, you go the distance. Get out of your comfort zone, compromise, hell you may even start watching sports. But ladies let’s be real you know when you aren’t being true to your self. Muster up the strength and move forward because there are over 4 billion men in the world, this loser isn’t the ONE.

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My Love Affair with Falling in Like

Why is that women don’t feel complete without the love and affection from a man? Okay so maybe the last statement may have been a little broad but nonetheless most of you know where I’m coming from. Life is just so different when you’re checking your phone every time you think you heard a vibration or magically you hear the new ringtone you just downloaded ( that you programmed just for him) don’t judge, you know you’ve all done it before. Point blank you walk a little taller, smile a little bigger, and even dress a little sexier( not sluttier ladies, just sexier), Courtney at the office doesn’t bother you ohh so very much and you can’t even explain this giddyness except to proclaim ” he said.. Have a great morning!”

I’m not saying it’s pathetic, because honestly thats what all of us young women are looking for. To know that you are being thought of and to know that he (in your most girly voice of voices) has been thinking about you. Your thoughts are consumed and all you want to do is spend more time with that person. You’ve thought about your next conversation, your next date, hell your wedding, honeymoon suite and what (insert children’s’ names here) will look like in the annual family Christmas card.

So ladies how is it that this man can alter us in such a way after a few dates? How is it possible to be so topsy turvy, so infatuated, so “in like” and so excited for something so new?

It’s natural, its’ what keeps the excitement in our lives. I mean who doesn’t love love? Who wouldn’t want someone to love you for you, someone who adores you? I mean come on you’ve just spent some of that rent money on a new outfit, new clutch and M.A.C eye shadow just for him! ( all of which I have done in the past, and do not condone let’s be financially smart here)  And then it hits you, the first time he sees you without makeup and says “You’re so beautiful”. You melt. You die. You want to immediately call your girlfriends and gush even before you have the time to breathe and say “Thank you”.

And when this new infatuation wears off and you find out that he may not be the guy for you. Remember that this love/ infatuation thing happens at first with everyone, it’s up to you to not be lazy and find the right one for you!

Go out there, BE YOU and find him ladies.